#i love danneel so much

[everlastingcastiel]

Ok so I'm meeting Jensen in August!! And I was wondering if he'd be offended by this t-shirt??

[cockelores]

hilarie burton about jensen: "he's so feminine deep down and i love that about him. soft and sweet man. " (48:50~)

[eepy-pleepy]

The thing is

It would be so easy for Jensen and Danneel to act normal about Misha if they were even a little bit normal about Misha

[regardingjenmish]

Hahaha drakes comment on jensens video 😂😂😂😂 was it payback fore what jensen wrote on his ? 😆

It most definitely was payback hdjska

[makeadealwithdean]

i’m crying i’m crying i can’t believe this happened. they really put a little party hat on him and sang and he acted all grumpy. nobody loves dean like jensen and i’m just so 🥹🥹🥹

[alwayscaskett810]

[hitmeupaep]

i knew it

[bringhimbackbuticanotidodean]

Happy birthday Danneel❤

[destiel-wings]

what did i just watch

I'm gonna need to take some time to sit down, pause and read every single one of those screens

thank you for this masterpiece summing up a somewhat historical moment

certified iconic 24 hours

[winchesterwild78]

A Shattered Heart

Master List

Jensen x Reader (girlfriend)

Warnings: Lots and lots of Angst, language, Jensen being a dick (sorry)

A/N: Just kinda in my head and feelings today…This story just popped in my head. Not sure if it’s going to be a one shot or a few chapters. I’ll play it by ear. I had to get this out before I could finish any of my other stories. 🫤 This is a work of fiction and does not depict real life. All work is my own and absolutely no disrespect to Jensen or his family. No idea why my head is filled with this story…..it’s brutal. I wrote it fast-like 30 minutes, and didn’t do a great job editing. Please overlook any errors. 

Minors DNI 18+

The soft glow of the lamp cast long, dancing shadows across the room. Jensen and you had been dating for a few months now, and while there were moments of pure bliss, the weight of his recent divorce often hung heavy in the air. His ex-wife had been particularly cruel during the proceedings, leaving him emotionally scarred.

You’d tried to be there for him, but he would often push you away to deal with things himself. He tried to keep things civil between him and Danneel, for the sake of the kids, but it proved to be a daunting task at times. 

After months of back and forth, they finally arrived at a custody agreement. He would get the kids when he wasn’t filming, and for some holidays. She kept the house in Connecticut and he got the one in Austin. Danneel tried to get both, but the judge decided she had gotten enough from him. Between child support, alimony, half the brewery and half the production company, she was practically set for life.

You had absolutely no problem with the child support, but you felt it was ridiculous she received alimony too. Jensen didn’t put up a fight about that. You respected him so much, the only thing he did fight for was his children. 

After the divorce was final, you moved in with him, into his Austin home. He told you to make any changes you wanted, because as he put it, “It’s your home too.” So you made some changes here and there, but keeping all of the things that were Jensen and of course his children. 

Danneel barely spoke to you, and would often refer to you as a homewrecker, trash, or some other derogatory term she could think of. It pissed Jensen off, because the two of you met after they split up, and you didn’t move in until after the divorce was final. 

You tried to pretend it didn’t bother you, but it really did. You fell in love with Jensen when you saw him at a convention, but you didn’t pursue him until after you heard they had split. Well, you really didn’t pursue him, you two just hit it off and got to talking. You both flirted, alcohol was free flowing, and then you kissed. That was it. Days later, after the convention ended, Jensen reached out to you on social media. You thought it was a joke until he sent you a picture and then video called you. After that you were completely smitten by him.

So now here you were months later, living with him and falling deeper in love with him. You hoped he felt the same way about you. The only obstacle was his filming schedule. It was something you weren’t used to yet, and sometimes it caused tension between the two of you. 

As Jensen’s marriage started to fall apart he purposely spent more time away from home. He took guest starring roles, did more conventions, and even started some new projects. It became a habit that was hard for him to break.

So now even though your relationship was good, he had commitments he had already made. It’s been an adjustment to say the least. Jensen was off filming again, and you were left alone, again. Your heart ached for him, your arms ached for him. The longer he was gone the more in your head you would get, and that was never a good thing. 

After a month-long shooting schedule, Jensen returned home looking haggard and exhausted. you could see the toll it had taken on him. The two of you had spent the evening cuddling on the couch, with you trying to soothe his weary soul. You made his favorite dinner, steak and potatoes, and even baked him a chocolate cake with chocolate frosting. 

“Thanks sweetheart for dinner and dessert. You didn’t have to go all out for me.” He placed a kiss on your forehead. “Yes I did, you’ve been gone for too long and I wanted to show you how much I missed you. Besides, who can say no to chocolate cake?” You winked at him. The two of you spent the rest of the night snuggled together under the blanket and talking while the tv played softly in the background. 

He told you about the latest project he was on, how he’d been called back to guest star in Tracker again. You could see his excitement, but part of you felt a pang of sadness, because that meant more time away from you. You bit your lip to prevent the tears from flowing. You were so proud of him and all his projects, but part of you wanted to be selfish and have him to yourself for a little bit.

Just as you were about to settle in for the night, his phone rang. It was Danneel. You could hear the anger in her voice as she berated him about his absence and how the alimony check was 2 days late. “Fuck, Danneel, it was only 2 damn days. You act like it’s the end of the world. Maybe if you got off your ass and worked it wouldn’t be that big of a deal! I was in Canada and the mail takes longer. Yes, it has to be a check. I want a paper trail to prove I paid it! Bullshit! You would throw me under the bus if you could. You’re just waiting to screw me over!” He ran his hands through his hair in frustration. You sat in silence as you watched the scene unfold in front of you. “No! I already told you I’ll be filming. I can’t keep the kids for spring break. That’s not fair, Danneel. Fine! Do whatever the fuck you want!” He hung up with a growl. 

You stepped closer to him and touched his arm, trying to offer some comfort. He shrugged you off, “Not now, Y/N! Fuck!” You flinched at his anger and his words. He’d never spoken to you like that before. It took you by surprise and it hurt. “I’m sorry, Jensen. I was just trying to help.” Your voice came out softer and smaller than you’d ever heard. “Well don’t! You’re not a part of this, you can’t help! Unless you know how I can continue to work and see my kids, while supporting them, my ex and you!” You gasped at his words. “What?! You don’t support me? I work, I make my own money.” 

Jensen scoffed, “Yeah right. Your little paycheck, honey I make that in a fucking day!” Tears filled your eyes and you let out an audible sob. Jensen turned and looked at you as you cried. His eyes were full of rage, his jaw tight with anger. You had no idea why he was taking his anger out on you. 

He ran his hands through his hair and let out a frustrated growl. “Fuck this shit! I can’t handle my bitch ex wife and now you crying like you are. I’m going out!” He grabbed his jacket and keys and left. 

As he stormed out of the house, you crumbled onto the floor, sobbing uncontrollably. His words, his anger playing over and over in your head like a record. Each harsh word, like a punch to the chest. You felt incredibly hurt, so betrayed, and so utterly alone. 

You eventually moved off the floor, when the tears refused to fall anymore. Exhaustion overtaking your body, your head pounding from the crying. Hours passed as you laid on the couch, curled in a ball. You checked your phone, hoping for a text or a call from Jensen, but nothing. As the hours ticked on your heart broke more. 

Around 4 am you were startled awake by the sound of the front door opening. Jensen came in, drunk. You could smell the whiskey on him. You sat up and looked at him, “Jensen, do you have any idea what time it is?” You asked softly.

“Nope, don’t care either. Why are you still here? I figured you’d be gone by now.” Jensen asked through slurred speech. You bit your lip and swallowed hard, “You don’t mean that Jensen.” 

You stood up and walked over to him. He stepped closer to you, saw your red, puffy eyes, “Yes I do, darlin’. I thought I made it clear I don’t want you here anymore. It’s only complicating things with my kids.” 

You scoffed as the pain and hurt shot through your body, “Okay, I’ll leave. Just know you’re the one who asked for me to leave, Jensen. I love you.” You walked upstairs without looking back at him. The tears were flowing freely now. Your heart was shattered. You’d given him everything, including your heart, and he just threw it all away. 

Walking into your shared bedroom, you looked around at the life you two had created. You grabbed a suitcase and started filling it up with things. You glanced at Jensen’s side of the bed and saw the picture Chris took of the two of you at the convention you met him at. You saw the love in his eyes and in yours. 

As you left the bedroom you walked back downstairs and found Jensen sitting on the couch. He glanced up at you and saw the suitcase in your hand. You walked over to the kitchen counter, took your key off the ring and set it down. 

Before you walked out the door, you turned around and locked eyes with Jensen. “I love you Jensen, please don’t forget that. I’m sorry I wasn’t good enough for you.” You swear his breath hitched at your words, but you turned so quickly you weren’t sure. 

You put your suitcase in your car and climbed in. Putting the car in drive you pulled out of the driveway, looking in the rearview mirror at the life you were now left to mourn. 

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[justjensenanddean]

Jensen Ackles | Purgatory Con, Düsseldorf, Germany, May 26, 2024, Panel Summary

Most creepy or annoying toy the kids ever had? Slime. It creeps him out. He has it all over his house now. He doesn’t like the texture or feel. But his kids love it. Creepiest? Danneel has an old antique doll. It is old cracked, has creepy eyes and is the devil. (x)

Demon Dean or Soldier Boy, who‘s more powerful? Demon Dean because SB has a traumatized little boy in him and demon Dean is just empty. He‘s more dangerous because he just doesn’t care. (x)

Funniest moment from set of The Boys? Someone yells Herogasm so Jensen says it was probably not the funniest moment but when he arrived on day 3 of the set, Jack Quaid asked if he‘s been on set yet and when it was a no, he said „whoo, good luck“ (x)

People kept mistaking the bottles of lube and the bottles of hand sanitizer. Jensen was not prepared for when filming started and everyone took their robes off. Jensen was not prepared. (x)

Jensen couldn’t not look. They called cut. Jensen was like „I‘m sorry, there’s 4 people over here doing a position I have never seen before.“ His shower was extra long that evening. „There may have been tears.“ (x)

“There’s four people over here in a position I have not seen before!!!” “My shower lasted extra long that evening. And there were tears.” Jensen retelling stories from Herogasm set on #TheBoys (x)

How long did it take him to learn the Arabic phrase for s14? Not long, he can parrot things quite easily. He just needs to hear it a few times, then he can repeat the sounds. It‘s how he learns accents. Tap dance worked like it too. If he can see or hear it, he can emulate it. (x)

Jensen: “I don’t think Cas’s confession is something that needs to be resolved. There is nothing to resolve. He said what he needed to say, it was a long time coming, it was heartfelt and beautiful. But there’s nothing to resolve.” (x) “Dean took it in and then lost one of his closest allies and friends. The accepting of that happened when Dean sat on the floor. He lost one of his brothers in arms and one of his closest people. When they come back, it’s just understood.” (x)

Are there situations where he accidentally or on purpose bring out Dean? Yes. Sometimes he thinks „it would be great to be Dean Winchester right now. He could have handled this.“ Dean is alive in him and comes out from time to time. (x)

Were there fake tears on SPN or did he ever cry? He wasn’t classically trained, so the emotion we see is real. He doesn’t know how to fake it. Compares it to a book or movie making you emotional. You know it’s not real, but it still gets you. (x)

After the s4 scene when Dean confesses to Sam about his 40 years and torturing in hell, he had to walk away because his body didn’t know it was fake. The barn scene was probably the most real, but for different reasons. He was saying goodbye to Dean, Jared, the crew. (x)

Crew members had to leave set because they were crying too. They were trying to dial it down, because it was too much emotion. (x)

When things get too serious? Laughter. It‘s his levee. When things get too heavy, he makes a joke to ease the situation. (x)

„Do you use Jared‘s conditioner?“ No he does not. That’s just what his hair does. (x)

Who inspires you? Jensen doesn’t idolize anyone, but he has a lot of respect for certain people and tries to absorb as much as he can when he meets them. Could be a brilliant scientist, an artist, an actor. (x)

Being cold on set? There was a scene with Bobby where they looked at a map over the hood of the car. Jensen told Bob Singer that it was ridiculous because they would look at the map in their car. But Bob wanted a specific job and told him to just get it done. (x) A few days after he got lasic surgery, he was supposed to wear sunglasses all the time. But he had to film in the sun with light shining in his face. Jensen was in so much pain that Serge covered the white surfaces in black. Didn’t help much. He took ibuprofen and powered through (x)

Dead in the Water when he had to hold the kid up and the diver pulled him under, it was the most eery feeling. He was terrified for the kid. But the kid actor had fun. / End of panel. (x)

(JMacLean)

[lila-lou]

✨His true fate - Part 8/?✨

Summary: Jensen hasn't been happy for years. But it seems almost impossible for him to escape. After another nasty argument between him and his wife, he decides to visit his ´former´ best friend for his birthday. Back in Austin, an encounter awaits him that will turn his life completely upside down.

Pairing: Jensen x Reader

Warnings: Some spicy scenes, Language, age gap

Word Count: 6601

A/N: English isn’t my first language, so please be lenient. 💙✨

Jared's teasing demeanor softened into a more serious expression as he glanced at Jensen, a hint of curiosity and concern in his eyes. "So, you guys didn’t settle on where this is going for now?", he asked, his voice quieter than before.

Jensen shook his head, his smile fading slightly as he considered Jared's question. "No, not really", he admitted, his tone thoughtful. "It's still early, you know? We're taking it slow. But I can tell you one thing—it's definitely not just a hookup for either of us".

Jared nodded, his expression becoming thoughtful. "That's good to hear", he replied sincerely. "She seems great".

Jared’s expression softened with understanding as he continued, choosing his words carefully. “Just keep in mind, Jensen, that after you end things with Danneel, things with (Y/N) will probably be easier”, he said gently.

Jensen paused, setting down the dish he was holding and meeting Jared’s gaze seriously. He knew Jared meant well and appreciated his friend’s straightforwardness. “I know”, Jensen replied quietly. “I’ve been thinking about that too. I just need to figure things out with Danneel first”.

"Talking to my lawyer is a good move", Jared said, his voice filled with empathy. "He'll give you solid advice on how to handle everything".

Jensen sighed, a hint of frustration creeping into his tone. "Yeah, I need all the tips I can get", he admitted, glancing down at the dishes he was supposed to be washing. "I've tried to bring up divorce with Danneel twice already, but she always manages to talk me down".

Jared frowned sympathetically. "She's good at that, isn't she?", he remarked, knowing Danneel's ability to sway Jensen's decisions. "Just stay strong, man. You know what you need to do".

Jensen nodded, his jaw tightening slightly with determination. "I do".

He glanced at his friend, noticing the hesitation before Jensen spoke again. There was a vulnerability in Jensen’s voice as he broached a different topic.

“You ever… believe in love at first sight?”, Jensen asked tentatively, his voice soft, almost hesitant. “Or fate, or… some shit like that?”.

Jared paused, surprised by the sudden change in conversation but understanding the underlying emotion behind Jensen’s question. He set aside the dish he was drying and turned to face Jensen fully, his expression thoughtful.

“Yeah, I think I do”, Jared replied sincerely.

Jensen nodded slowly, his gaze distant as he processed Jared’s words. “I guess I’m just wondering if… maybe there’s something like that out there for me too”, he admitted quietly, almost to himself.

Jared could sense Jensen's introspective mood, the weight of his contemplation palpable in the air between them. He leaned against the kitchen counter, folding his arms across his chest as he considered Jensen's question.

“Not to push your luck, but with (Y/N) and you, it pretty much seems like something like that”, Jared remarked with a reassuring smile, his tone gentle yet sincere.

Jensen looked up, meeting Jared’s eyes with a mix of gratitude and uncertainty. He appreciated Jared’s optimism but couldn’t shake off the doubts that occasionally clouded his thoughts, especially when it came to matters of the heart.

“I hope so”, Jensen replied quietly, his voice tinged with longing. “I really do”.

Jared nodded understandingly. “You’ve got a good thing going with her, Jensen”, he said earnestly. “Just take it one step at a time, and things will fall into place”.

Jensen managed a small smile, appreciating Jared’s words of encouragement. “Thanks, man”, he said sincerely, feeling a bit lighter knowing that his friend believed in him and (Y/N).

While Jensen spent time with Jared, you busied yourself unpacking the last of your stuff and decorating your apartment. You wanted everything to look nice when Jensen came over tomorrow. As you arranged a vase of fresh flowers on the coffee table and fluffed up the pillows on the couch, your mind wandered to thoughts of what tomorrow might bring.

You didn’t know what to expect. Everything between you and Jensen had been moving quickly yet also cautiously. The visit today had felt like a milestone, a step closer to something more. But you were unsure where things would go from here. Would tomorrow be casual and comfortable, filled with laughter and easy conversation like today? Or would it be charged with a different kind of energy, exploring deeper connections and shared moments?

Despite the uncertainty, you felt a surge of anticipation and hope. Being with Jensen felt right, and you were willing to see where this journey would take you both.

As the evening settled in, you found yourself reflecting on your feelings for Jensen. The anticipation of his visit tomorrow filled you with a mix of excitement and nervousness. You had just finished dinner, tidying up the kitchen when your phone buzzed on the counter. You glanced at the screen and saw Ben's name. Your heart sank a little, the complicated nature of your relationship with him resurfacing.

Sighing, you picked up the phone, deciding to get this over with. “Hello?”.

“Hey”, Ben’s voice came through, casual and familiar. “How’s it going?”.

You took a deep breath, trying to keep your tone neutral. “I’m fine, Ben. What do you want?”.

There was a pause on the other end, and you could almost hear him gathering his thoughts. “I’ve been thinking a lot lately, about us”, he began, his voice hesitant. “I know things have been rocky, but I miss you. I want to work things out”.

His words sent a ripple of emotions through you—anger, sadness, and a hint of nostalgia for what once was. But they were quickly overshadowed by the clarity of how much you had changed since you last saw him.

You took a deep breath, steadying yourself before responding firmly. “Ben, I already told you I needed a break. We can’t keep going in circles like this”.

Ben’s voice took on a pleading tone. “I can change, (Y/N). I know I messed up, but I’m willing to do whatever it takes to make things right between us”.

You sighed, feeling a mix of frustration and sympathy. “Ben, it’s not just about you changing. It’s about us not being right for each other anymore. We’ve grown apart, and we need to accept that”.

There was a brief silence on the other end of the line, and you could almost hear Ben processing your words. Finally, he spoke again, his voice tinged with desperation. “But we had something good, didn’t we? We can get that back”.

You took a moment to collect your thoughts, the weight of Ben's words pressing on you. His plea for another chance stirred memories of happier times, but they were overshadowed by the pain of betrayal.

"Oh, you mean the good times before you cheated on me?", you snapped, unable to hold back the bitterness in your voice. The hurt and anger surged through you, fueled by months of confusion and heartache.

Ben audibly swallowed, his voice faltering slightly. "I… I regret that. I made a mistake", he admitted, his tone pleading.

"You made a choice", you countered sharply, your emotions raw. "A choice that changed everything between us".

"I know", Ben replied quietly. "And I've been trying to make amends ever since".

"It's not that simple", you replied, your voice softening despite your resolve. "Trust doesn't come back overnight, Ben. It's been hard for me to even consider trusting you again".

There was a heavy silence on the line as both of you grappled with the weight of your words. You could hear Ben struggling to find the right response, his breaths coming out in uneven intervals.

Finally, he spoke again, his voice thick with emotion. "I still love you, (Y/N). I'm willing to do whatever it takes to prove that to you".

You closed your eyes, battling conflicting emotions. Part of you wanted to believe him, to grasp onto the hope that things could be repaired. But another part knew that moving forward meant letting go of the past.

"I need time", you said finally, your voice steady but firm. "Time to heal, time to figure out what's best for me".

"I understand", Ben replied softly. "Just… don't shut me out completely, okay?".

You nodded, even though he couldn't see you. "I won't", you assured him, feeling a twinge of guilt for the pain you were causing him.

With a heavy heart, you ended the call, setting your phone down on the table beside you. The weight of the conversation hung in the air, but alongside the sadness was a glimmer of relief—a step toward closure.

Meanwhile Jensen propped himself up against the headboard, the dim light from the bedside lamp casting a warm glow across the room. He held his phone steady as JJ’s face appeared on the screen, her tired eyes gazing back at him.

"Hey", Jensen greeted softly, a smile tugging at his lips. "How was your day?".

JJ yawned, rubbing her eyes sleepily. "It was okay", she murmured, her voice small through the phone's speaker. "But I miss you, Dad".

Jensen's heart twinged with longing. "I miss you too, sweetheart", he replied gently. "I wish I could be there with you".

JJ nodded, her expression solemn. "When are you coming back home?", she asked, her voice tinged with hope.

"I'll be back soon", Jensen reassured her, his tone comforting. "Just a few more days".

JJ sighed softly, shifting in her bed. "Okay", she replied quietly, though her eyes still held a hint of sadness.

Jensen’s chest tightened with the ache. "Tell me about school", he prompted, trying to lighten the mood. "Did you finish that book you were reading?".

JJ brightened a little, nodding eagerly. "Yeah! It was really good", she exclaimed, launching into an animated description of the story.

As JJ talked, Jensen listened intently, his heart swelling with pride and love for his daughter.

After a while Jensen set his phone down on the nightstand, he heard JJ’s small voice mumble through the still-active call.

“Dad, you’re never home”, JJ murmured, her words tinged with a mix of sadness and accusation.

Jensen’s heart sank further, the weight of his choices pressing heavily on him. He picked up the phone again, his expression full of regret. “I know, JJ”, he said softly. “I’m really sorry about that. I miss you so much”.

“Why can’t you be here more?”, JJ asked, her voice trembling slightly. “I just want things to be like they used to be”.

Jensen took a deep breath, trying to find the right words to explain a situation far too complex for her to fully understand. “I’m trying to figure things out, sweetheart”, he replied gently. “It’s complicated, but I’m doing everything I can to make things better. I promise I’ll be home as soon as I can”.

JJ nodded, though her expression remained troubled. “Okay, Dad. I just miss you. And I wish Mommy wouldn’t get mad so much”.

Jensen felt a surge of anger and helplessness, wishing he could shield JJ from the turmoil at home. “I miss you too, JJ. Just remember, no matter what, I’m always here for you. You can call me anytime, okay?”.

“Okay”, JJ said softly. “Love you, Dad”.

“Love you too”, Jensen replied, his voice filled with emotion.

As the next day dawned, you decided to head out for some shopping. You picked up a variety of snacks and drinks, including beer and whiskey, not entirely sure of Jensen’s preferences. After loading everything into your car, you drove back home, feeling a mixture of anticipation and nervous excitement.

Once home, you decided to indulge in a relaxing spa day. You filled the bathtub with warm water, adding your favorite bath salts to create a soothing atmosphere. As the tub filled, you set out your razor and shaving cream, determined to be prepared for whatever might happen later. You slipped into the warm water, letting the tension melt away as you took your time shaving, making sure you felt your best.

As you settled back into the tub, savoring the tranquility, your phone vibrated on the edge of the sink. You reached for it, seeing a message from Jensen. The simple text made your heart skip a beat.

“Hey there”, Jensen’s message read, making your heart skip a beat as you read it. “How’s your day going? Is 7 pm good for you?”.

You smiled to yourself, feeling a rush of excitement at the thought of seeing him later. Quickly drying your hands, you replied, “Hey, I’m just a bit tired, might take a nap before you get here. And 7 pm sounds perfect”.

Jensen’s reply came swiftly, his playful tone evident even through text. “A nap, huh? Making sure you’re well-rested for me, I see. Smart move. See you at 7”,

After sending your reply, you settled back into the warm bath, allowing the soothing water to ease away any lingering tension. The relaxing soak helped clear your mind, and after a while, you stepped out of the tub feeling refreshed and calm. Wrapping yourself in a soft towel, you made your way to your bedroom, ready for a quick nap to ensure you were well-rested for the evening ahead.

Meanwhile, at Jared’s house, Jensen was preparing for the evening as well. He stepped into the shower, letting the hot water cascade over him, washing away the stress of the past few days. The anticipation of seeing you again filled him with a sense of eagerness and excitement.

After Jensen finished his shower, he stepped out into the steamy bathroom, grabbing a fluffy towel to dry himself off. He ran the towel over his damp skin, the warmth and scent of the shower gel lingering on him. His thoughts were focused on the evening ahead, the prospect of seeing you bringing a smile to his face.

Once he was dry, Jensen headed to his room to decide on an outfit. Tonight was casual yet he wanted to look good for you. He settled on a pair of black jeans that fit him well, emphasizing his toned legs. For the top, he opted for a fitted black long-sleeve shirt, the fabric stretching slightly around his biceps.

After selecting his outfit, Jensen moved to the bathroom mirror to style his hair. He ran a comb through it, adding just the right amount of product to achieve a casual yet polished look. Satisfied with his appearance, he reached for his favorite cologne and spritzed a generous amount on his neck and wrists, wanting to leave a lasting impression.

Just as he finished, Jared walked into the room, a casual question on his lips. “Hey, Jensen, do you know how to make a cheese sau—”, Jared’s sentence trailed off as he entered, stopping short and chuckling at the scene before him. Jensen was practically standing in a cloud of cologne, the scent lingering heavily in the air.

“Whoa, man!”, Jared exclaimed, laughing. “Did you drown yourself in cologne or what? Trying to knock her out with that?”.

Jensen turned towards Jared, a sheepish grin on his face as he asked, “Too much?”, He rubbed the back of his neck, feeling a little lost. It had been a while since he had been on a real date, let alone one that he had high hopes for, especially with everything else going on in his life.

Jared chuckled, shaking his head as he took in Jensen’s slightly bewildered expression. “Yeah, man, just a tad”, he replied, trying to suppress his amusement. “But hey, at least you’ll smell unforgettable”.

Jensen laughed softly, feeling a mix of nerves and excitement building up inside him. “I just want tonight to go well, you know?”, he admitted, his voice earnest. “It’s been a while since I’ve felt like this”.

Jared’s expression softened, understanding dawning in his eyes. “I get it, Jensen”, he said, his tone sincere. “Just be yourself. (Y/N) likes you for you, cologne cloud and all”.

Jared crossed his arms and watched Jensen as he carefully put on his watch, then observed his friend glance at his ring finger. Jensen hesitated for a moment, his brow furrowing in thought, before decisively pulling off his wedding ring and placing it on the small shelf above the sink.

Jared's expression remained neutral, knowing better than to comment on such a personal decision. He respected Jensen's space, understanding the complexities involved in Jensen's situation with Danneel.

"You okay?", Jared asked gently, breaking the silence that had settled between them.

Jensen nodded, though his expression reflected a mixture of relief and sadness. "Yeah, it's just… feels weird, you know?", he admitted.

Jared nodded in understanding, offering Jensen a reassuring smile. "You're doing what's best for you and for (Y/N)", he said quietly. "That's what matters".

Jensen took a deep breath, steeling himself for the evening ahead. With a final glance at his reflection in the mirror, he turned towards Jared with a determined expression. "Thanks, man", he said sincerely. "For everything".

Jared nodded, clapping Jensen on the shoulder in a show of support. "Anytime, buddy. Now go get 'em", he said with a grin.

After your refreshing nap, you woke up feeling a mix of excitement and nerves about the evening ahead. As you stood in front of your closet, you debated over what to wear, your thoughts lingering on the possibility of something happening with Jensen. Eventually, you settled on a delicate lace bra and matching thong in a deep, alluring red, thinking that someone of Jensen’s age and taste would appreciate the choice.

With your underwear sorted, you opted for a more casual yet cute outfit, given that you would be watching a movie and staying in. You slipped into a pair of comfortable yoga pants that hugged your curves in all the right places and paired them with a slightly oversized shirt that offered a relaxed, yet stylish look.

Satisfied with your outfit, you took one last look in the mirror, adjusting your hair and touching up your makeup. You wanted to strike the perfect balance between looking effortless and feeling confident.

After a while, just as you were putting the finishing touches on your makeup, the doorbell rang, sending a flutter of anticipation through you. Taking a deep breath to calm your nerves, you glanced once more in the mirror to ensure everything looked just right before making your way to the door.

Opening it, you were greeted by the sight of Jensen standing there, looking handsome and relaxed in his black jeans and fitted black long-sleeve shirt. His eyes lit up when he saw you, a warm smile spreading across his face.

“Hey”, Jensen greeted warmly.

“Hey”, you replied with a grin, stepping aside to invite him in. “Come on in”.

Jensen stepped inside, looking around with an appreciative gaze. “It’s exactly how I imagined your apartment to look like”, he remarked, his eyes taking in the modern white furniture and pastel-colored decorations that adorned the space.

“Really?”, you asked, pleased with his comment. “What do you mean?”.

Jensen chuckled softly, his eyes twinkling with amusement. “It’s just… it’s very you. Modern, clean, and stylish. It’s a refreshing change from how my house looks. My wife’s taste is the complete opposite”.

You nodded, understanding the subtle comparison he was making.

You cleared your throat, trying to ease the slight awkwardness that settled in the air after Jensen's unintentional comparison. "Well, I'll take it as a compliment", you said with a small smile, hoping to lighten the mood.

Jensen turned towards you, his expression sincere. "It definitely is", he assured you, his voice warm. He paused for a moment, then chuckled softly and pinched the bridge of his nose in frustration. "Sorry, that was a bit… not what I meant", he muttered, realizing his slip-up. "I didn't mean to bring her up or compare…".

You waved off his apology gently, understanding the complexities of his situation. "It's okay, Jensen", you said softly, reaching out to touch his arm reassuringly. "No harm done".

Jensen sighed, his gaze meeting yours with gratitude. "Thanks", he murmured, a faint smile tugging at his lips. "I just… I don't want to mess this up".

You squeezed his arm gently, offering him a reassuring smile. "You're not messing anything up", you assured him. "Let's just enjoy tonight, okay?".

Jensen nodded, his shoulders relaxing slightly. "Yeah, okay", he agreed, his tone more confident now.

"You smell good", you mumbled before turning around. Jensen grinned, thinking about Jareds teasing. "Thanks".

You walked into your open kitchen, Jensen following close behind. As you headed for the fridge, you glanced back at him over your shoulder, a small smile playing on your lips. “So, what can I get you to drink?”, you asked, your voice light with a touch of nervous excitement.

Jensen leaned against the countertop, watching you with an appreciative gaze. “Hmm, surprise me”, he replied casually, his eyes twinkling with amusement.

You nodded, opening the fridge and pulling out a couple of options. “Well, I’ve got beer, whiskey, some wine, and a few non-alcoholic options too”, you listed, turning around to face him.

Jensen’s smile widened. “How about a beer for starters?”, he suggested, his gaze lingering on you.

“Sure thing”, you said with a nod, reaching for a bottle of beer from the fridge. As you handed it to him, your fingers brushed against his briefly, sending a jolt of warmth through you. You couldn’t help but notice the lingering scent of his cologne, which intensified as he leaned closer.

You bit your lip and grabbed a soda for yourself, feeling the butterflies in your stomach intensify as Jensen’s eyes continued to roam around your apartment. He took another sip of his beer, still leaning against the countertop, clearly enjoying the moment.

“Did you clean for me coming over, or are you just a clean person in general?”, Jensen asked, his tone teasing but genuinely curious.

You shrugged and grinned, feeling a bit playful. “A little of both, I guess”, you admitted. “I like to keep things tidy, but I might have done an extra sweep before you came over”.

Jensen chuckled. “Well, it shows. Your place looks great”.

You felt a warm blush rise to your cheeks at his compliment. “Thanks”, you said softly.

The room fell into a comfortable silence, both of you sipping your drinks and stealing glances at each other. There was an unspoken tension between you, the memory of the kiss you shared lingering in the air. Jensen hadn’t kissed you when he arrived, and you found yourself wondering if he wanted to but hesitated.

For Jensen, the drive to your apartment had been filled with anticipation. All he could think about was the moment his lips would meet yours again. But when he saw you, looking so effortlessly beautiful, he found himself chickening out, unsure if it was too soon or if you even wanted it.

You broke the comfortable silence with a smile, wanting to ease any lingering tension between you and Jensen. "So, how did you spend yesterday?", you asked casually, hoping to shift the focus to something light and enjoyable.

Jensen's face lit up as he recounted his day. "Jared and I went jet skiing on the river", he replied, his eyes bright with enthusiasm. "It's something we haven't done in a long time, just the two of us".

You nodded, imagining the scene. "That sounds like fun", you commented, genuinely interested. "Must have been nice to unwind and spend some time outdoors".

"Yeah, it was", Jensen agreed with a smile. "It felt good to do something different for a change".

As he spoke, you found yourself relaxing more, enjoying the easy conversation between you. The tension that had lingered earlier seemed to melt away as you both settled into a comfortable rhythm of sharing stories and laughter.

As you continued your conversation, moving from small talk to more meaningful topics, you found yourselves seated comfortably on the couch, facing each other. The atmosphere was relaxed, with occasional bursts of laughter and moments of shared understanding.

At one point, you mentioned your dislike for Harry Styles’ music when Jensen unexpectedly brought up attending one of his concerts. His explanation came swiftly, “It was for my daughter”, he admitted, his voice catching slightly in his throat. The admission slipped out before he could think better of it, and he noticed your surprised expression.

You paused for a moment, processing this new information. Jensen hadn’t mentioned having children before, and you understood why—he didn’t want to overwhelm you or potentially scare you off with his family situation.

“Oh”, you responded softly, trying to keep your tone neutral. “You have kids?”.

Jensen nodded, a mix of emotions flickering across his face—vulnerability, uncertainty, and a hint of worry. “Uhm… Yeah, I do”. he confirmed, his gaze meeting yours earnestly. “I haven’t brought it up before because… there was already so much you had to take in”.

You nodded slowly, trying to compose yourself. Jensen was indeed a grown man, but hearing that he also had kids added another layer of complexity and maturity to his character. It was a reminder that he had a life beyond what you had seen so far, with responsibilities and priorities that extended far beyond your budding relationship.

“Wow”, you finally responded, a mix of surprise and curiosity in your voice. “How many kids do you have?”.

Jensen shifted slightly, looking relieved that you weren’t reacting too negatively to the revelation. “I have three”, he answered quietly, his tone soft yet proud. “Two daughters and a son”.

You hesitated for a moment, trying to find a way to lighten the mood. A playful smile tugged at your lips as you looked at Jensen, deciding to take a chance with a teasing comment. “So, you’re a real daddy, huh?”, you said with a mischievous glint in your eye.

Jensen’s eyes widened slightly in surprise before a slow, amused smile spread across his face. He chuckled softly, shaking his head. “Oh, I see what you did there”, he replied, his tone playful yet slightly self-deprecating. “I guess I am”.

You laughed, feeling the tension ease as the mood lightened. “Sorry, I couldn’t resist”, you said, still smiling. “But seriously, it’s really impressive how you manage everything. Being a dad and handling your career… it can’t be easy”.

Jensen’s smile softened, a touch of vulnerability in his eyes. “It’s definitely a balancing act”, he admitted.

Jensen saw an opportunity to delve into more personal topics, wanting to get to know you better on a deeper level. He cleared his throat, looking at you with a hint of curiosity and playfulness in his eyes. “But you’re not into that daddy kink stuff, right?”, he asked carefully.

You chuckled and felt your cheeks heat up, blushing as you shook your head. “No, not really”, you replied, still smiling. “But…”. You stopped yourself, suddenly feeling shy and blushing even more.

Jensen raised an eyebrow, a smirk playing on his lips as he leaned in slightly. “But?”, he prompted, his voice soft and encouraging.

You took a deep breath, mumbling shyly, “But I am sure into dirty talk”.

Jensen’s smirk widened, his eyes twinkling with amusement and interest. “Oh, really?”, he said, his tone low and flirtatious. “Well, that’s good to know”.

Jensen leaned back slightly, a playful glint in his eyes as he teased, “Well, someone’s full of surprises tonight”, His voice carried a low, suggestive tone that sent a shiver down your spine.

You giggled nervously, feeling a rush of excitement mixed with a hint of bashfulness at his response. “I guess you could say that”, you replied coyly, meeting his gaze with a playful twinkle in your eye.

He leaned closer again, his voice dropping to a husky whisper, “You know, I think I’m starting to like these surprises”.

You raised an eyebrow playfully, a smirk forming on your lips as you teased Jensen in return. "So, it seems dirty talk isn't a red flag for you either?", you quipped, your voice laced with amusement and a touch of flirtation.

Jensen chuckled, his eyes sparkling with warmth and desire. "Definitely not a red flag", he replied, his tone filled with playful confidence. "In fact, I might even say it's a green light".

You grinned, feeling a surge of boldness as you leaned closer to him. "Oh, really now?", you murmured. "Well, I guess we'll have to see where this green light takes us".

The air around you seemed to crackle with anticipation, the playful banter weaving a web of attraction and desire between you. Jensen's gaze held yours, his expression filled with a mix of admiration and a growing hunger for more.

Jensen's smile widened, clearly enjoying the effect his teasing had on you. “So, do you have more green lights for me?”, he asked.

Your cheeks flushed a deeper shade of red, but you didn't back down. Instead, you licked your lips slowly, meeting his gaze with a confident glint in your eyes. “Wouldn't it be more interesting for you to find out?”, you replied, your voice a sultry whisper.

Jensen’s eyes darkened with a mix of amusement and desire. He leaned in even closer, his breath warm against your ear as he murmured, “Is that an invitation?”.

You felt a shiver run down your spine at his proximity, his words sending a thrill through you. “Maybe it is”, you whispered back, your voice barely audible but filled with unmistakable intent.

Jensen’s hand moved to gently cup your cheek, his thumb brushing lightly against your skin as he held your gaze. “Then I guess I’d better start finding out”, he said softly, his voice laced with anticipation and a promise of more to come.

The air between you seemed to pulse with electricity, the playful teasing giving way to a deeper, more intense connection. Jensen’s eyes searched yours, waiting for your response, his touch a gentle yet insistent reminder of the chemistry that had been building between you.

Your heart began to race the moment Jensen’s touch connected with your skin. It felt as though a bolt of lightning had struck you, sending shivers down your spine. You bit your lip, trying to steady yourself, and mumbled, “We said we wanted to take it slow…”.

But Jensen’s response was immediate and decisive. With one hand cupping your waist, he pulled you gently but firmly onto his lap, pressing you flush against his solid chest. The sudden proximity made your breath catch, and you could feel his heart beating just as fast as yours.

“I know we did”, he murmured, his voice a low rumble that resonated through your body. “But some things are worth speeding up for”.

He gazed into your eyes, his expression a mix of desire and tenderness. The intensity of his gaze made you feel as if the world around you had melted away, leaving only the two of you in this intimate bubble.

You swallowed hard, the heat between you becoming almost unbearable. “Jensen…”, you whispered, your voice trailing off as you struggled to find the right words.

He leaned in closer, his lips brushing against your ear as he whispered, “Tell me if you want me to stop”.

But any words you might have formed evaporated the moment Jensen’s lips found the soft spot just below your ear. The gentle kiss sent a shiver of pleasure through you, and a soft whimper escaped your lips before you could stop it.

That simple, involuntary sound was enough to make Jensen’s arousal evident. You could feel his erection growing beneath you, pressing firmly against you in a way that sent waves of heat through your body. The realization made you gasp softly, your body responding instinctively to his touch.

Jensen’s hands moved with purpose, one sliding up your back, drawing you even closer, while the other gripped your hip with a possessive firmness that made your heart race. He kissed down your neck, each touch of his lips igniting a trail of fire on your skin. You arched into him, your breath coming in quick, shallow gasps as his lips found new sensitive spots, making you shiver and moan softly.

His fingers slipped under the hem of your shirt, tracing the line of your spine, sending delicious shivers through you. The feel of his rough, calloused hands against your smooth skin was intoxicating, making you crave more of his touch. You could feel your own arousal building, a deep, insistent ache between your thighs that begged for relief.

Jensen’s kisses grew more insistent, his lips and teeth grazing the sensitive skin of your neck as he sucked and bit gently. Each touch sent a spark of electricity through your body, heightening your arousal. You could feel the hard length of his erection pressing against you, the friction driving you crazy with desire.

With a rough urgency, Jensen’s hands gripped your hips and pressed you down more firmly against him, causing you to gasp at the intensified sensation. The heat between you was almost overwhelming, your bodies moving instinctively against each other.

You managed to find your voice, your breath hitching as you whispered, “We… we were going to watch a movie…”.

Jensen’s hands paused for a moment as he heard your whispered words, his touch lightening slightly but still lingering on your hips. His lips, warm and moist from kissing your neck, hovered close to your ear.

“We can still watch a movie”, he murmured huskily, his breath sending tingles down your spine. “But right now, I want you more than anything”.

You shivered at his words, feeling the weight of his desire pressing against you both physically and emotionally. Despite the initial intention to take things slow, the raw intensity between you was undeniable, drawing you closer with each passing second.

Your mind raced with conflicting thoughts—desire battling with caution, yearning fighting against the need to maintain control. But as Jensen’s hands traced patterns on your hips, his thumbs rubbing soothing circles, it became increasingly difficult to resist him.

Jensen’s mind was a whirlwind of desire and need, his thoughts almost entirely consumed by the longing to be closer to you. As he held your hips tightly, feeling the heat between you, he could barely think straight. The urge to be inside you was overwhelming, an almost desperate craving that he couldn’t explain.

With more need, his hands dropped to the hem of your shirt, his fingers brushing against your skin. But just as he began to lift your shirt, a flicker of hesitation hit you. You placed your hands on his, stopping them from moving any further.

Jensen drew back slightly, his brow furrowing in confusion as he looked into your eyes. “You´re okay?”, he asked softly, his voice a mix of concern and tenderness.

You hesitated for a moment, your eyes meeting Jensen’s with a mix of vulnerability and nervousness. Taking a deep breath, you whispered, “It’s been a while… I’m kinda nervous about it”.

Jensen pulled back slightly more, his gaze intent and searching. “How long?”, he asked directly, his tone gentle but curious.

Your cheeks flushed with a deep blush as you cleared your throat, feeling a bit embarrassed. “Uhm… maybe three years”, you whispered softly.

Jensen’s face fell forward, resting against your collarbone as he let out a low, strained growl. “Fuck”, he muttered, his voice thick with emotion.. “You’re practically a fucking virgin all over again”, he said, his voice a mix of awe and frustration.

Jensen’s words hung in the air, charged with a mix of desire and concern. The thought of how long it had been since you last had sex turned him on even more, but he was acutely aware of the responsibility that came with it. He didn’t want to rush anything or make you feel uncomfortable.

Sensing your tension, Jensen sighed deeply, his breath warm against your skin. He gently pulled back, looking into your eyes with a tender, understanding gaze. "You want to watch that movie now?", he asked softly, his voice laced with care and a hint of disappointment.

He hoped you might decline the offer to watch the movie, silently expressing his desire for more. But he also knew it was important to respect your comfort level and give you the space you needed.

You nodded softly, surprised by your own shyness. Jensen’s understanding and patience made you feel safe, but there was an unexpected fear lurking in the back of your mind. The fact that he was older and an actor, with undoubtedly more experience, intimidated you. You couldn’t help but wonder if he had been with women far more beautiful than you, and that thought scared you off.

Jensen swallowed hard, taking in your nod and the emotions flickering across your face. He could sense your hesitation and the underlying fears you weren’t voicing. “Alright”, he mumbled softly.

You bit your lip, feeling the weight of your insecurities, and Jensen gave you a small, reassuring smile. Trying to lighten the mood, he said with a low chuckle, “I could really use a whiskey now”.

You stood up, ready to get the whiskey for him, and as you moved to the kitchen, Jensen took the opportunity to adjust himself. He tugged on his jeans, trying to shift his erection to a more comfortable position. The desire was still there, but he wanted to make sure you felt at ease and not pressured.

In the kitchen, you took a moment to gather your thoughts, pouring a glass of whiskey for Jensen and one for yourself. You returned to the living room, handing Jensen his drink with a small smile. He accepted it gratefully, taking a long sip to steady himself.

“Thank you”, he said, his voice a bit more relaxed now. He patted the spot next to him on the couch, inviting you to sit back down.

You sat down next to Jensen, feeling the warmth of his body as he wrapped an arm around you and pulled you close. You shot your whiskey in one go, the liquid burning a comforting path down your throat. Jensen chuckled softly at your bold move, his fingers tracing gentle circles on your arm.

“Alright, let’s see what we’ve got”, he said, looking through the movie options. You tried to focus on the movie selection, but Jensen’s touch made it increasingly difficult.

Finally, you settled on a movie, trying to calm your racing heart. Jensen shifted slightly, pulling you even closer against him.

———————————

A/N: Please let me know what you think.🥰

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Part 9

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Taglist: @cheynovak @chriszgirl92 @jenniferr0323 @angelbabyyy99 @cevansbaby-dove @muhahaha303 @jackles010378 @suckitands33 @n-o-p-e-never @mayafatimakhan @ladysparkles78 @viviandarkbloom06 @jassackles @evasmlp @acklesaddict67 @mostlymarvelgirl @emma1998sblog @mishaesque @headinthemoon87 @hobby27 @winchesterwild78 @impala67rollingthroughtown @manicjk @kr804573 @zaratahir @djs8891 @winchesterwild78 @jamerlynn

[wellofdean]

Sorry ,for me personally, it has to be out loud acknowledge to even remotely make up for how badly they treated fans over the years, the out loud queerbaiting in one breath and mocking in the next. The in text gay jokes, sexism and homophobia. The digs at their own fans.

They want the credit without having to do it. Again. They want the pat on the back they need to earn it this time.

Years of baiting for views and profit needs a payoff imo. Sorry people downplaying how important the canonization of this ship in particular is just hurts to see over and over. Stop letting them off the hook please. You deserve more. We all do.

It’s important. It does matter.

The cas/destiel hope baiting continued with the Winchesters and that’s why I’m at a put up or shut up moment with Jensen and the writers. He and Danneel kept the hype up every week that the show was airing all the while knowing cas doesn’t even get a name drop. He’s not even hinted at. Mary/john paralleled destiel so many times yet refused to call it want it was.

They could have shut it down week one, they interacted on tweeter a lot during airing and knew what fans thought there was going to be an acknowledgment or hint that never happened. They are smart people, they saw the speculation and hype but didn’t step in with a gentle ‘sorry guys this is about the new crew’ they fanned the hope instead with ‘something big happens’ that was just dean meeting the new team.

Loved the Winchesters as a show, sad it got dropped cause I loved the new cast so much. That said the baiting hurt and wasn’t necessary, the show was good.

Everyone is looking back with rose colored glasses and rewriting history. But things were ugly with the spn team/cast/writers at times. The homophobia was pretty out loud in a way it was allowed to be in the early 00s. They’ve grown and that’s wonderful but it still happened.

They need to earn the praise they want imo. No hate! Glad you are happy! just feels a little unfair to say we should all let them off the hook again and be happy with nothing while praising the benevolent straights. Just my two cents 😅💚💙

I want to answer this sympathetically, because I know it's disappointing that no one has been willing to just say "Dean and Cas are gay for each other" out loud, and I don't think there are many people in this fandom who picked up what the narrative was putting down, and were not disappointed in the finale for LOADS of reasons, only one of them being that Dean never had the chance to acknowledge what Cas said to him. I understand your feelings, my anonymous friend, I really do. I too found the end of Supernatural deeply frustrating, because they managed to erase the meaningful journeys of every single character, not just Dean, though what they did with Dean was the worst. I completely understand wanting them to JUST FUCKING SAY IT. I do. I get you. I simply do not agree.

My argument, which I have made many, many times, is that what you want is THERE in the narrative. They made Cas Dean's ride or die, they made it obvious that Dean can't carry on without Cas -- that the loss of Cas means Dean loses his will to live. That was explicit. They made it clear that more than anyone else, EVEN Sam, Cas is essential to him. They structured the narrative around Dean and Cas's emotional beats. They let Cas say the obvious thing out loud, and then showed us Dean behaving exactly as Dean would in a situation like that -- in the midst of his existential crisis about who he is and whether he has ever had free will, and with the world falling around them -- they showed us Dean unable to speak, unable to respond but overwhelmed with emotion. Like, remember that when Mary died when Dean was four, he was unable to speak? Is it really so hard to imagine that he loves Cas with all his heart? To read love in Dean's watery eyes, and the way he chokes down his heart and begs Cas not to do this? Not to being saying goodbye? I mean... I CAN DO THAT MATH. Literally everything about the story supports it. IT IS THERE.

Fandom always argues: if Cas were a woman, we wouldn't have any questions, so what I am just wondering is, why do we have questions again? Is it because we (homophobically) can't just see it for what it is because it's gay? Because, when it's gay we lose our ability to interpret narrative, and we need to be told, like we are 5 years old, what's happening in a perfectly obvious story? Or, is it a skill issue? Is it because we need the creators of the story to affirm our interpretation? We need the actors to just TELL US what they meant when they did that thing with their faces? Do we need their permission to understand it for what it is?

I've said many times that calling what happened on Supernatural 'queerbaiting' because no one ever made out or fucked on the maps table is really offensive to me actually. Don't you know that there are queer people in this world who never get to live their truths? Who just ache and yearn and want, and never get to have? Like, that there are in fact queer people who are afraid to say what they feel, or who don't understand or embrace who they really are and what they really need until it's too late? Are those not QUEER EXPERIENCES? I love Dean and I love that story because it's queer as hell and it makes ME feel seen, because I am like him! I am a queer person of his age who didn't ask myself those questions seriously enough in time! My own queerness is very fucking real, and it is UNLIVED. That HAPPENS to actual queer humans, and like, it's not queerbaiting when it's just queer, but didn't tell you the queer story YOU wanted it to tell. You saw years of tease? I saw years of choices, and love, and accretion of deep wells of emotion. I saw a clear romance, and a character becoming. It was a story I needed, AS A QUEER PERSON.

And the Winchesters was just joyful if you went in with that understanding of the previous story. It was like getting an A+ in Supernatural week after week from Dean himself. I can accept that the stars didn't align for Cas/Misha to come back in the first season, accept that if he were coming back, it needed to be more than a cameo to make it right, and that it didn't work out. I am so sad it was cancelled, but I can accept that it was leading someplace it didn't get to go. That's not queerbaiting, either! It's telling a story that was aborted, and I think if you don't see that, then that is DEFINITELY a skill issue.

I'm not looking back with rose coloured glasses; Supernatural is fresh in my mind. I watched it again without the internal pressure of expectations that aren't going to be met, and let it tell me what it was really doing all along. I am happy. It's a really compelling, deeply romantic, deeply queer story. I don't need permission from anyone involved to think that, and I don't need it explained to me. I understand wanting it to just be fully explicit, but I would not trade the story it did tell for a simpler, less engaging one, that asked less of me. I love it very much AS IT IS.

And, please: point me to this fabled abuse of fans. I have never really seen an example of it that is not easily debunked with a little bit of context.

[gilliannicoll]

m

[kickingitwithkirk]

Paschal Moon 2.0 -1/2

Summary: Jensen finds love the second time around can be bumpier than an armadillo-laden roadway in Texas.

Pairing: Jensen Ackles x Fiancé!Reader

WC: 2120

Warnings: fair amount of drinking and flangst, relationships are hard, insecurities, cursing, sexy teasing, arguments, family issues, reader still saying shit like me IRL

*Please read Paschal Moon first. This story is a continuation of it.

A/N: It's been a minute since I've been up to writing after Covid kicked my arse, but I had this sequel idea bouncing around and splitting into two parts.

A/N II: I based readers home on this property I’d love to live on in Utley, Tx

A/N III: This is a work of fiction, and no intentional disrespect to the real-life persons contained within.

Square Filled: @jacklesversebingo -“I’ll always take care of you as long as you need me” in bold @j3bingo -Foreplay

*Moldavite

*divider by @firefly-graphics

*no Beta-all mistakes are mine

*photos found online

The screen doors creaking made Jensen look up from the sheet music he was working on and saw his fiancée couldn't help but smile. Six months ago, he was so deep in divorce drama that it was providence meeting this nerd-hot astronomy professor who lives in the boonies.

“Hey, sweetheart,” he said, sitting his guitar on the couch, expecting her to reciprocate, but she just walked through the kitchen door. Okay, that’s not good, Jensen thought. Crossing the main room, he found Y/N’s messenger bag lying on the floor, her jacket carelessly tossed on top, and shoes kicked in opposite directions.

Jensen heard a cabinet door slam shut in the shoebox-sized kitchen as he gathered the items and placed them in their usual spots before entering the kitchen to find Y/N leaning against the old butcher block countertop with a finger crooked in a bottle of Fireball Whiskey's handle, chugging it like an old moonshiner made him remark, “Guess you've had a day.”

Pulling off she bitterly responds: “It’s been crapdamntastic. And how was yours, dear?” This shocks her fiancé. Y/N never called him that, once saying the endearment had a negative connotation from her childhood when she suddenly stomped off. When the hundred-year-old farmhouse’s pipes rattle, it snaps Jensen out of it, and, like the last time Y/N had guzzled that much alcohol too fast, he sees the trail of clothes left in her wake.

Now concerned, he gathered the articles and deposited them in the bath hamper. “Gonna tell me what set you off this time?”

A very unladylike snort came from behind the shower's glass door, “Check your phone.” He retrieved it from the charger in the bedroom and plopped on the large bed, thumbing through multiple missed text stops at the one from his manager marked urgent opens the included link. “Wha…Motherfucker!”

In an exclusive interview, OTH star Danneel Ackles reveals the real reason her ex-husband, Supernatural's Jensen Ackles, deserted his family.

A bath sheet-wrapped Y/N sat down cross-legged, facing Jensen as he continually tugged a hand through his long hair while reading the article full of falsehoods. Jensen suddenly dropped his phone and reached for the bottle copied her earlier chugging, “You know those paparazzi that've been harassing since Inks Lake?”

Jensen acknowledges, remembering the night a few weeks ago when Y/N’s astronomy class took a field trip, secretly arranging to take her camping instead (something he wouldn’t normally do on a dare) and proposed during the celestial event.

“Well, today, they got into the auditorium during my lecture and began shouting those derogatory accusations from that piece when several of my students took it upon themselves to intervene. Long story short, I’m on unpaid leave until the school finishes its inquiry.” His following words this is my fault made Y/N snap. “Oh, the hell you say! You’re absofuckinglutley not at fault here! Danneel acting like a snake in the grass!”

“Danneels pissed because,” but Jensen didn’t finish, instead guzzling on the last of the bottle.

“Because beg-a-bitch badly miscalculated you’d come crawling back and trying to save face! Peaches, I knew being together would have bumps, but this?” She points to his phone, “Face facts, Jensen. Your ex is a Regina George who’s gone too damn far covering her swamp ass!” Jensen sputtered on the cinnamon whiskey burning down the wrong pipe, “Swamp ass?”

“Urban Dictionary, page two, definition four.”

Jensen began to speak, but Y/N placed her fingers against his plump lips. “You’ve always been inclined to let a lotta crap slide to keep the peace because she’s the mother of your children. But Jensen, it’s time to redraw the boundaries of what is acceptable and what’s not ‘cause I don’t want your kids to grow up with resentments like I have towards mine.”

“Ohhh my god! Keep giving it to me just like this Peaches!” 

Y/N, sucking on her fingers, moaned in ecstasy, then pulled them out with an obscene pop before reaching for another slab of the ribs Jensen fixed in the outdoor smoker. “Good thing we’re not in public; otherwise, you’d get an obscenity charge.”

“It was one time, and I got off with a warning.” She cheekily remarks, “Besides, my meat man deserves props.” Jensen’s fair skin flushed; his tell when embarrassed but also when aroused makes Y/N grin and tease him by sucking the bones clean.

“Y/N, I wanted to talk about something, and don’t take this the wrong way.” Jensen takes a long swig of his beer before tackling the tricky subject. “Since we’re staying with my family for dad’s birthday, could you tone it down? Your personality can be a bit much.” Y/N got that expression, which he still wasn’t sure how to interpret.

“Calling me extra, that’s rich, considering your profession is full of fake people.” Jensen suppressed his automatic response. “Y/N, it’s just my parents; they’re very conservative.” She dropped her uneaten ribs and sat back.

“I might’ve grown up po-dunk,” her tone signals he’s close to stepping over the line. “But I know how to act around those types; otherwise, I wouldn’t have my position at UT Austin, let alone be headhunted by SpaceX for their new facility coming to Texas!” The flash of surprise crossing Jensen’s face didn’t slow Y/N down. “Would working for Elon Musk be acceptable to the high-fluttering Ackles clan? Or do they consider his personality a bit much?”

Hitting his limit, Jensen’s near-perfect features morphing into I’m done with your shit expression irked her more.

“You know what? We’re a couple of liquorlip loaded guns and better table this conversation till capable of being civil. Thank you for dinner, it was delicious.” Y/N gets up and grabs the rest of the six-pack. “I’m gonna polish these off in the guest house.”

“This is your house.”

“I know.“ Y/N says, twirling her engagement ring around her finger. “Kinda hoping sleeping alone in my bed will clarify whether you had a holy fuck, I’m over forty and single again moment and jumped the gun proposing or really ready for this life with me.” She laid the ring on the table before Jensen, and staggering slightly down the porch steps, disappeared into the moonless night.

Jensen was sitting on the kitchen banquette, watching the ancient oak leaves dance on the breeze through the window, when Y/N padded in barefoot, clad in one of his T-shirts, damp hair hanging loosely down her back, and no makeup.

God, he loved how she rocked the all-natural look, so different from Danneel, who always had to be camera-ready, watches Y/N sleepily fumble around, realizing the kettle was already heated, she added the tea diffuser, steeping it before pouring it into an oversized mug.

She shuffles and plops across from him, leaning on an elbow, waiting for Jensen to speak. “It wasn’t a knee-jerk reaction. You are the person I want to be with for the rest of my life.”

“Why?”

That one-word question hung in the air because Jensen knew what Y/N wanted.

It wasn’t the usual platitudes of I love you or can’t live without you. She wanted him to be open, raw, vulnerable, something he always had trouble with, exposing his innermost self.

“Figured after a decade in the industry, I had a grasp of how to tell fake people from real ones. I believed I knew Danneel because we’d been friends. Then she kissed me in Ten Inch Hero and we,” Y/N quirked an eyebrow as he ran a hand through his long hair, “I knew her boyfriend but did all my thinking with the wrong head. It wasn’t my finest moment.”

Jensen picked up the mug he’d already drunk and refilled it. “Looking back, I realized there were signs; our normal banter changed at some point. It was stupidly easier to ignore our issues in Vancouver or at cons.” Y/N remains quiet, so Jensen wouldn’t stop opening the hurt box and acknowledging the truth.

“I let Danneel manipulate me, thinking she supported my career by encouraging me to take on more roles. After getting pregnant with JJ, said she wanted to move back to Texas to be closer to family. Then pushing for more kids, ignoring what I wanted, to secure her position. And the other duplicity’s to get financial support for whatever project interested her.”

Jensen didn’t notice Y/N sliding across the seat beside him as he buried his face in his hands, “I've been her lifelong meal ticket. How could I have been so fucking stupid?!”

“Jensen, you aren’t stupid, you were in love. And some marriages work better with a bit of separation. What’s making me hella pissed is Grade A Cunt going around acting like butter wouldn’t melt and blaming you for her cheating!”

Y/N softens her approach, “Those weeks you didn’t call, figured you lost my number cause you’re another Hollyweird dickwad who didn’t wanna get caught with Ms. one-foot outta the trailer park.” Jensen shook his head, “I wouldn’t have taken you bar hopping to the ones I frequent if being seen together was the real problem. Why didn’t I call,” he shook his head again. “I didn’t know how to respond to you crashing through my insecurities like a…”

“Two by four in a tornado?”

“Pretty accurate and disturbing description.”

“Peaches, wanna know what I see when I look at you?” Jensen turned toward her, eyes loaded with apprehension. “A guy who feels too much, so he hides behind this reserved veneer and Da Vinci perfect face, kinda like his alter ego.”

Jensen pushes the mug over and takes her hand, placing the ring back on her finger. “I don’t know how to be without you anymore, so do me a favor. Don’t take this off again, okay?”

“Okay,” she reaches up, cupping his bearded cheek, "Peaches, I’ll always take care of you as long as you need me. So, we done with this emotional colonic?” Jensen laughs and kisses her. “That’s my girl.” He then licked his lips, “How about heading back to bed? We have a few hours before picking up the kids.” Y/N got up taken both mugs to the sink.

“I guess, since my propensity to get laid is about to greatly diminish staying with your parents, the con, then you heading off to finish up The Winchesters afterwards.”

“You have the weirdest technique for enticing a guy, sweetheart.” Jensen’s T-shirt smacks him in the face, and he's about to give her what for is gobsmacked at a completely naked Y/N standing in the doorway striking a seductive pose.

“This technique work for you, Peaches?”

Jensen glances in the SUV's rearview mirror to see which of his kids are acting up. But Clif, without looking, knows what’s happening and loudly asked, “Do the adult children need a timeout?” The noise abruptly stops as Jared and Y/N point at each other and simultaneously say, “He/She started it!”

****

The trip ended up taking a lot longer due to road work slowing traffic on the way to dropping Jared and Clif off at the hotel, and Jensen was relieved to pull into his parents' driveway. Getting out, twisted his torso to loosen up tense back muscles froze when the squeals of mommy rang out, and heard Danneel say she was also staying for the weekend.

Y/N grabs Zeps's backpack before stomping to the vehicle's rear, and when Jensen rounds the SUV, he is greeted with obscenities that would make a sailor blush and luggage hitting concrete. “Sweetheart, I have no idea why Danneel is here...”

“Because I invited her,” Donna Ackles says from not three feet away, and Jensen becomes frosty.

“Mom, we discussed this. You knew I was introducing Y/N to the family this weekend.” Donna comes back with, “Just because you abandoned your marital oath doesn’t change the fact that Danneel's family. And I had assumed your friend would be staying at that hotel, too.”

“Well, you know what they say about assumptions, Mrs. Ackles.” Donna’s eyes widened at Y/N's flippant remark, “You are a very impudent!”

“No, ma’am, inviting your son's lying whore ex to stay in the same house without his knowledge, that’s impudent," Y/N retorts. “I’d bet the farm your intentions are to demonstrate to everyone how dime in a dollar store I seem next to Danneel, hoping Jensen will be embarrassed enough to send me packing. Hate to disappoint you, but I don’t intimidate easily. So,” She stepped into Donna personal space and, with hands on hips says…“Bring it on, Grandma.”

SPNTAGS:  @donnaintx  @lyarr24  @flamencodiva @lassie-bird  @nancymcl  @spnbaby-67 @leigh70 @b3autyfuld1sast3r

Sam/Jared: @idreamofplaid

Dean/Jensen: @thoughts-and-funnies  @stoneyggirl2  @beabutterfly987   @smoothdogsgirl @deans-spinster-witch

[winchesterwild78]

A Shattered Heart pt 2

Master List

Jensen x Reader (girlfriend)

Warnings: Angst, language, longing 

A/N: Apparently I made Jensen too much of an asshole and now I feel terrible. 🫣 So, here is the 2nd part of the story. This is a work of fiction and does not depict real life. All work is my own and absolutely no disrespect to Jensen or his family. No idea why my head is filled with this story…..it’s brutal. It's gonna get better...I promise. I wrote it fast-like 30 minutes, and didn’t do a great job editing. Please overlook any errors. 

Minors DNI 18+

The days without Jensen blurred together. After you left that night you drove to a hotel to stay until you could figure out what to do next. You called your mom for advice and just to hear her voice. “Why don’t you come home for a visit. We’d love to see you, and maybe some time away will help the two of you. Honey, I’m not making excuses for him, but he’s got a lot of people depending on him and that kind of pressure can break even the strongest of people.” “I know mama, but he told me to leave. The things he said were just so cruel. I’m the one person he’s supposed to turn to when things get hard, and he pushed me away.” 

Your mom offered you more words of encouragement and by the end of the conversation you had booked a flight home for a few days later. After telling her goodbye you climbed into the bed, looking at your phone hoping for a text from Jensen, but there was nothing. It was almost 6am by this point and you were exhausted. You figured he was asleep or passed out. Laying down and turning your phone on silent, sleep quickly overtook you. 

You woke up early in the afternoon. Stretching you glanced at the clock and saw it was almost 2pm. Your eyes were swollen and your head pounding from all the crying. Stumbling out of bed you made your way to get some water and headache medicine. 

After taking the medicine you decided a hot shower might help too. You grabbed your clothes, toiletries, and jumped in the shower. After a very long, very hot shower, you were starting to feel a little better. 

It had been 3 days at this point since Jensen told you to leave. Three days without his arms around you, without his hot breath on your neck, without his lips on yours and without him saying he loved you. Anytime your phone went off you jumped, thinking it was him, but nothing. It had been 3 days and he hadn’t reached out to you. You tried to keep tabs on him through mutual friends on social media, but you saw nothing. 

Your heart ached for any news on how he was doing. Was he just as heartbroken as you were, just as sad, or was he fine with his decision? You took some time off from work to sort everything out, and to fly home for a few days. You packed up and made sure you had everything from the room. 

Stepping out into the cool air your breath hitched. You had an Uber drive you to the airport. You boarded your plane, turning off your phone, settling into your seat for the flight home. 

*Jensen’s POV*

I woke up with a horrible hangover. The most I remember from last night was the fight with Danneel, drinking a ton of whiskey, and….oh shit! I told Y/N to leave. I jumped out of bed and ran downstairs looking for her. Going room to room praying it was a dream and she was still there. Then a small piece of metal caught my eye, her key. I grabbed my phone and tried to call her, it went straight to voicemail. I tried again, still voicemail. “Fuck!”

I called Jared, “Jared I fucked up! I don’t know how to fix this.” Jensen said in a panicked voice. “Whoah, Jens, slow down. What happened?” “I fucked up. Danneel called me last night, I had just gotten home from filming and we got into a huge fight. When I hung up I took it out on Y/N. Shit, man. She was only trying to help me. I said some really fucked up things, then I…” His voice trailed off. “Jens, then you what?” “I told her to leave. I got drunk and told her to leave. She left. I haven’t heard from her and when I try to call her it goes straight to voicemail. Shit man, I love her. What the hell did I do?!” 

Jared took a deep breath, “Give me a second man.” He covered the phone and told Gen what happened, asking her to call you and see if she could get you to come over. She pulled out her phone and the call went straight to voicemail. She shook her head at Jared.

“Jens, do you know where she might be?” Jensen sat in silence for a minute, “No, well, maybe she went home. Like her mother’s house.” “Okay, do you have her mother’s number?” Jared asked. “Yeah, somewhere. I’ll have to find it. Damn I said some horrible things, I know I lost her Jared. I saw how much I broke her before she left and I just fucking sat there. What the fuck is wrong with me?!” “We will figure it out, Jensen. In the meantime you need to figure out why you took all of that out on her. If she decides to come back to you, you have to figure out what triggered you and how to prevent it from happening again.” 

Jensen knew why he did it. He was falling for you faster than he expected, and he got scared. Scared that when all the shit was going on with his ex you were the first person he wanted to turn to for help. When he thought about the future and doing things with his kids he saw you there too. He was in deep, so deep he had thought about what marriage would look like with you. He was terrified if he opened up his heart to you, like really opened his heart, you would break it too. Jensen loved you, but he was afraid of another failed marriage.

He knew it was stupid, but people do stupid things when they are scared. 

For three days Jensen, Jared and Gen tried to get in touch with you. Nobody could reach you. Jensen was due back on set in a few days and he had no idea how he could go. Jensen searched everywhere for your mom’s number but couldn’t find it. As the days continued to pass without any word from you, Jensen fell deeper into despair. 

You sat in your seat on the plane, earbuds in and trying to clear your head. You scrolled through your phone, looking at the pictures of you and Jensen. Thousands of pictures of stolen glances, soft kisses, and laughter. There were pictures of Jensen and his children, candid shots of Jensen you thought he didn’t know you took, but he did. He had several of you too. 

Your heart ached for him, but his cruelty played over and over in your head. Frustrated, you tossed your phone in your bag and closed your eyes. 

A few hours later you were standing inside the airport waiting for your luggage. Your phone started pinging with notifications once you turned airplane mode off. You shoved it in your pocket as you grabbed your suitcase and walked towards the front. 

You ordered an Uber to drive you to your parent’s house. Looking at your phone you noticed you had a ton of text messages and an Instagram notification. Climbing into the Uber you sat back and checked your messages.

Gen: Hey sweetie. Jensen told us what happened. I just wanted to check on you. Reach out when you can. We’re worried about you. 

Jared: Hey shortstack. Gen and I are here for you. He’s a fool. Please let us know you’re okay. 

Then you saw Jensen’s name. You swallowed hard, checking the messages.

Jensen: Sweetheart I’m so sorry. Please let me know you’re okay.

Jensen: Baby I fucked up. Please call me or text me. I’m worried about you. 

Jensen: I know you’re angry and hurt. I don’t blame you. Baby, please let me know you’re okay. Nobody has heard from you.

Jensen: I love you

Jensen: Y/N you didn’t deserve what I said and you didn’t deserve me taking all this out on you. I love you, baby. I know I hurt you and I don’t deserve your forgiveness, but please just let me know you’re okay. 

Your breath hitched as you read his messages. He hurt you, broke your heart, but you couldn’t help but feel the need to reach out to him. You stared at your messages trying to figure out what to do. So you decided to send Gen a text first.

You: Hey Gen. I’m okay. I had to get away for a bit. He broke my heart, told me to leave so I did. I can’t be with someone who pushes me away like that. I love him, but I deserve better than that.

Gen: Oh, Y/N. I am so glad you’re okay. I know sweetie. He called Jared. We understand and support you. Just know he regrets what he did. The past three days he’s been trying to find you and reach out to you. For what it’s worth he does love you, he’s just scared.

You: I’m scared too, Gen. I fell for him fast and then he tossed me to the side. I have to come to terms with not being good enough for him, not being what he needed. I don’t know if or when I’ll reach out to him, but please let him know I’m okay. I should be back in Texas in about a week. I know he has to go back to set, so please let him know I’ll have Jared go by the house with me to get the rest of my stuff. 

Gen: Oh sweetie, you are good enough for him. He knows what he’s lost. I will tell him you’re okay. When you get back we will figure out your stuff. We love you.

You: Thank you, and I love you guys too.

Sitting your phone down you looked out the car window and saw your parent’s neighborhood come into view. You took in a deep breath and let it out slowly. When the car pulled into your parent’s driveway you saw your mom at the door. Her bright smile is a welcome sight. 

Getting out of the car, you grabbed your bags and walked towards your mom. Her arms outstretched to pull you into a hug. 

Her arms around you felt like home. You felt safe and loved. The weight of the pain came crashing down again and you sobbed into your mother’s arms. “Shh, it’s okay baby. Let it out. I know, baby.” She whispered into your head as she held you. 

As you pulled away, the tears still falling, you let out a shaky breath. “Mama, I still love him. It just hurts so bad. I don’t know how or if I can fix this.” 

“Let’s get you inside baby. We will figure it out.” She wrapped her arms around you and walked you inside. Your dad was standing in the living room and when you saw him he pulled you into a hug. “Hey baby girl. It’s good to have you home.” His strong steady voice washes over you. You loved your mom but you were a daddy’s girl. He was the first man to ever hold your heart and he had always been protective of you. 

When he found out you were dating Jensen he told him he better not hurt you. Jensen promised him he wouldn’t. “Daddy, I don't know what to do. I still love him so much.” “I know you do, baby. Give it a few days and the two of you should talk. You don’t let him treat you that way. If you go back you tell him he can’t do this to you. You deserve better than that. However, there isn’t ever a perfect relationship. You two have to work at it every single day if you want it to last.” Your dad pulled you tighter. “I know daddy. Thank you.” He kissed the top of your head as you pulled away. 

You went to your old bedroom and put your things down. You sat on the bed and pulled out your phone. That’s when you remembered the Instagram post you were tagged in.

Opening Instagram your breath hitched. It was a post from Jensen. It was a picture of the two of you. One you didn’t know he had taken. The two of you were on the couch, snuggled and you had fallen asleep on his chest and he was smiling softly at the camera. It was a sweet picture of both of you. 

His caption took your breath away. “My love, my beautiful girl, my home. I’m a fool to let you slip away. I’ll spend the rest of my life, until my last breath trying to make this right. I love you @yourusername. Forever and always. 

Tears were streaming down your face. Jensen was usually very private so him making this post about the two of you was incredible. You didn’t know what to say. 

You read through the comments and saw so many supportive comments and some calling Jensen out for whatever he did. You chuckled a little, but your heart ached for him. 

You decided to like the post. Just a little olive branch to let him know you still cared, still loved him. Even if he was being an asshole. 

Jensen’s POV

I was sitting at Gen and Jared’s house. Gen told me she’d heard from Y/N. I wish she’d call me, I miss her voice. The two of them were trying to encourage me but until I was able to talk to her nothing mattered. I needed to tell her how sorry I was. Even if it was too late for us, I needed to make this right. I hated that I made her feel like she wasn’t good enough. 

Jared handed me a beer and as Gen got up to check on the kids she squeezed my arm. “It’s going to be okay, Jens. She loves you so much. It’s just going to take some time.” 

I nodded and smiled softly. My phone buzzed in my pocket and I glanced at it. It was Instagram. I opened it and saw Y/N had liked my post about us. I gasped. Tears filling my eyes. “Jared, she saw my post. She liked it.” Jared smiled “That’s great Jens. It’s a start.” 

“Do you think I should text her?” Jared and Gen looked at each other, “I think you should wait for her to reach out. You’ve let her know you’re ready to talk, so let her make the decision.” 

I nodded and hesitantly put my phone down. 

Your POV

You showed your mom the Instagram post and asked her opinion. “It seems like there is still a lot of love there, Y/N. I can’t tell you what to do, but if it was me I’d give him a chance to explain and you get a chance to let him know how you feel. If you’re in love with him and he’s in love with you, then you owe it to yourselves to give it another chance.” 

You nodded and smiled at her. “Thanks mama. I can always count on you to help me.” 

She hugged you and gave you a soft kiss on your forehead. 

You bit your lip and pulled out your phone. Taking a deep breath you opened messages. 

You: Hey 

Jensen: Hey baby 

You: Are you busy?

Jensen: No, never too busy for you. 

You: Can I call you to talk? 

Jensen: I’d love that baby. 

You swallowed hard and stepped outside on the porch. Your hand trembling you dialed his number. 

Jensen answered almost immediately, “Hey baby. I’m so glad you called.” 

Your voice was soft and shaky, “Hey, Jens. We have a lot to talk about. 

“Yeah I know we do. It’s so good to hear your voice baby. I’ve missed it, I’ve missed you.” 

A tear slipped out from your eyes. “I’ve missed you too, Jens. I have to know why. Why did you make me leave?” 

“Baby I’m stupid. There isn’t a good enough excuse or reason for the way I treated you. I’m an asshole. I need you to know I'm so sorry for what I said and did. If I’m being honest I’m scared, Y/N. I had one failed marriage that ended really bad. I was afraid it was going to happen again.” 

“But Jensen, we aren’t married. Why would you think you’d have another failed marriage?” “Because I’m in love with you, Y/N. It scares me how quickly I fell in love with you, when I see you I see a marriage, I see our lives together forever, I see home.” 

You gasped softly, “Jensen I loved you too, so much. I saw a future with you too, but I didn’t toss you to the side. I deserved better than that. I deserve someone who is my partner, who will turn to me when things get tough, not against me. I deserve someone who doesn’t make me feel like I’m not good enough. Dammit Jensen, I would have married you if you had asked.”

Jensen ran his hands through his hair and sighed heavily, “I know baby. I’m so sorry. Me being scared is not an excuse for the way I treated you. Please come home so I can fix this. I’ll head home right now and meet you there.”

“Jensen, I’m not in Texas. I left. You told me to leave, so I did. Besides you have to be back on set tomorrow so I’m sure you’re leaving soon to catch your flight. It was scheduled for 6pm.”

Jensen’s voice cracked as he tried to hold back his emotions, “I didn’t mean it baby. I didn’t want you to leave. Fuck! Where are you baby?” “Jens, it doesn’t matter. You’re expected on set tomorrow, you have all those people depending on you and I know you don’t want to let them down. Maybe when you get home in a month I’ll come by and we can talk.”

You didn’t want to tell him you were at your parents’ house because you knew he’d be there in a heartbeat. 

“Baby I don’t want to wait a month. I want to work on us now. We deserve that, you deserve that. I’ve already called the producers and we’ve pushed back filming. You are more important than any show.”

“Jensen, I can’t ask you to do that. I know how important your career is to you. Please don’t throw it away over me. I’m not worth that. You’ve worked too hard to get to where you are. Please Jensen.” 

“Sweetheart, nothing, you hear me, nothing is more important to me than you and my kids. I love you and I’m willing to fight for us. Please tell me where you are and I’ll come to you.”

“I need some time, Jensen. You hurt me deeply. I should be back in Texas by the end of the week, we will talk in person then if you still want to.” 

Jensen felt a little pang of sadness. He didn’t want to wait to talk to you face to face. He wanted to hold you in his arms and kiss you again. However, he knew this was his fault. All of this was his doing, so he wanted to let you lead. 

“Okay, baby. I understand. When you get back in town, let me know and I can meet you somewhere. I love you, Y/N, and for what it’s worth, I’m sorry.”

“I know you do, Jensen and thank you. I’ll let you know.” “Y/N, before you hang up, can we still text or chat? We can keep it neutral and I promise I won’t pressure you.” “Sure, Jensen, and Jensen, for what it’s worth, I still love you.” 

Tears fell from his eyes and his heart clenched in his chest. Now he was determined more than ever to make this right. “I love you too, baby. I’ll talk to you soon, goodbye, darlin’.” “Good bye, Jensen.”

You hung up and the tears fell. Holding the phone to your chest. Your mom watched from the kitchen window and saw the love you still had for him. Her heart ached for you, so she was determined to give you a little push.

She walked into her office and pulled out her phone and called Jensen.

“Hello?” He answered with a questionable tone. “Hey, Jensen. It’s Y/M/N.” “Oh hello, Mrs. Y/L/N. How are you?” “Jensen dear, how many times do I have to tell you to call me Y/M/N?” “Yes, ma’am. I’m sure by now you know I screwed everything up. I want to tell you and Mr. Y/L/N I’m doing everything I can to make it right. I love your daughter so much.”

“I know you do, honey. She loves you too. That’s why I called. She’s here and lord knows she has a stubborn streak. I bet she told you she’d talk to you at the end of the week when she gets back, didn’t she?” Jensen chuckled, “Yes, ma’am she did.” “That sounds like our girl, well how about you fly in for a visit? It’s been too long since I’ve seen you, and I think this is something best dealt with in person.” 

“Yes, ma’am. I’ll book the first flight out. I’ll let you know when I’m on my way.” “Okay dear, and Jensen…” “Yes, ma’am?” “You fight like hell to keep her, we really like you.” Your mom chuckled. “I plan to. Thank you Y/M/N, for believing in our relationship and helping me make this right.” 

The next morning you woke up to the smell of bacon and pancakes. You stretched and smiled. You and Jensen had talked off and on all night, both of you finally saying good night about 1am. The conversation was light and almost flirty, like when you two first started talking to each other. It made your heart flutter. You were still in love with him, but you were still hurt too. 

Getting out of bed you decided to take a quick shower before heading downstairs. Once showered and dressed you walked down the stairs and could smell the breakfast and coffee your mom had made. When you walked into the kitchen you saw a ton of food. 

“Dang mom, I don’t eat that much. Surely you didn’t do all this for me?” She laughed, “No honey, your dad is going to eat breakfast with us before he heads out.” You smiled and grabbed a coffee cup and filled it up. Your mom handed you a plate and smiled widely at you and nodded towards the food. 

“Thank you mama. I’m starving.” You chuckled as you shoved a piece of bacon in your mouth. As you sat down to start eating you heard the doorbell. Your parents and you shared a look. It was almost 9am, so you weren’t sure who would be over there so early. “I’ll get it.” You said. Standing up and walking towards the door you noticed your parents acting strange. 

You looked over your shoulder at them and chuckled as you opened the door. When you turned back towards the door you saw who had rang the bell. Your breath hitched and a lump formed in your throat. You could barely speak, but managed to whisper out, “Jensen.”

“Hey sweetheart.”

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